When we’ve made a big decision, many of us obsess over whether or not we got it “right.” At the end of Chapter 7 of Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway, Susan offered some exercises to help us let go of our need to control the outcome of our decision. One of them is the “It Doesn’t Really Matter” exercise.
To begin this exercise, start with little decisions you make every day—what clothes you should where, what to make for dinner, if you should stop by the dry cleaners. As you consider these types of small decisions, notice that it doesn’t really matter. Blue shirt and gray pants? It doesn’t really matter. Spaghetti or casserole? It doesn’t really matter. Stop at the dry cleaners today or tomorrow? It doesn’t really matter.
As Susan wrote, “Each choice simply produces a different experience. Slowly you will be able to apply this concept to larger and larger decisions.”
When we make our decisions without being fixated on the outcome, we are more relaxed. Being obsessive about any decision doesn’t make it more likely to turn out better. In fact, the opposite happens. So, put signs in your home and office that say “It Doesn’t Really Matter” to help you remember that obsessiveness never helped anyone.
I think from a young age I was conditioned to make certain choices based on someone elses experiences. These grooved in, but I feel many things change, me in particular, because its unimportant to make decisive decisions. Life changes constantly, so choices ultimately change. I feel less stressed at being more flexible.
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